Face Front, True Believers!
As Mark Twain never said, “Rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.” What he really said was “The report of my death was an exaggeration.” Of course he’s dead now so it’s all moot. I, on the other hand, am not dead…I think. Do zombies think? Let’s just agree that I’m ambulatory.
You may be wondering what has kept me from being here to astound and confuse you. Go ahead, wonder. Hmmm..what could it be? When you figure it out let me know what it was. I’ll bet it’s pretty interesting.
So let’s talk facial hair for a moment. Pretty coarse stuff, huh?
Now let’s talk moustache wax. Have you folks seen the prices on some of these things? It’s getting absurd. Let’s face it, at its core, moustache wax is beeswax and a carrier, shea butter or petroleum jelly seem the most common. Sprinkle some foo foo (essential oils, conditioners) in to taste and Bob’s your uncle. I’ve imported some freaky deaky stuff, some sort of toxic sludge in a tube (*cough* stern *cough*), and paid slightly more than normal but that’s the nature of imports. However when I see a moustache wax that lists for 13 euros for HALF an ounce, that’s 17.50 for us Yanks, and the ingredients are “beeswax, castor oil, jojoba oil and a blend of essential oils”, I don’t understand what the hell is going on…and that was without shipping. It ends up being slightly over 20 bucks total to bring to the US. Just look around, you’ll find them.
I haven’t approached the topic of price before because my feeling was, “money means different things to different people”. That changed. Now my feeling is, “money means a lot to me and I’m taking it into consideration”
Right off the top of my head I’ll name four moustache waxes that I think do AT LEAST a good enough job, if not an excellent job of keeping my stache in place. Keep in mind that my stache extends about 5 inches on each side which I curl solely with waxes (no gels, pomades or sprays).
The Devil’s Choice – 10.00 for 1 oz – Petroleum Free (but has pine sap!) about 14 US shipped
I’m not trying to hawk someone’s wares like some screaming, polyester suited, used car dealer commercial you see on late night television when you should be sleeping but couldn’t for some reason so decided to go sit on the couch with a cup of tea but are now thinking it was probably a bad idea because there’s some screaming, polyester suited, used car dealer on the TV
… (deep breath)…
I’m trying to make sure that those of you out there who might be new to grooming their soup strainers aren’t put off by people trying to make a quick buck off a classic style that has seen a resurgence in popularity. Expensive != Better.
Am I wrong? Let me know. I’m not shelling out the kind of prices this new round of boutique moustache waxes are asking. If you’ve tried, or actually make them, and have also tried the more affordable products let’s hear it.